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29 October 2010

America: So I'm Drivin', Drivin', Drivin'

"That's three times. I'm drivin' riiight." - Lenny Henry. Lenny Henry has no relevance to the rest of this story, its just a quote from a funny sketch on The Secret Policeman's Third Ball that contains the word drivin'. The link of course being that over the four days out of Chicago, we did a lot of driving.

On the way we stopped at the house of two traveller's, on an invitation extended from Oktoberfest. So it was that we rolled into Fort Dodge, Iowa and were immediately set upon with kindness and fresh vegetables. I don't wish to sound flippant (this time), this couple really were the nicest people you'll ever meet. At just the right time, after three weeks on the road, they gave us real beds, a warm and comfortable house and more fantastic food, fresh from their garden, than even four hungry lads could eat.

The next morning we were taken to the fort that gives Fort Dodge its name.
Carved with a chain-saw, by men!
After more food, followed by a quick tour of the town, followed by more food, we set off on another day of straight flat driving, accompanied by many a joke about "Getting the hell out of Dodge." In reality, however, all of us will forever look upon Fort Dodge with enormous affection.

Another night, another motel, followed by a very scenic drive to a rather disappointing Mount Rushmore, and then a very scenic drive down the other side. The actual monument ruined an otherwise very nice site, which the Americans then made worse with a big auditorium and tourist shops. Think stripper's on Uluru, oh, wait... Actually, it wasn't that bad, but it was more permanent. Also, I didn't get any photos, because I packed the camera and wasn't impressed enough to bother getting it out of the car. I'm really, really bad at this tourist thing.

After a very nice descent from Mt Rushmore, we drove through Wyoming, which is flat. Very flat. And empty. Very empty. We were saved from certain death by empty fuel tank by Lusk, and finally arrived, late and weary, but very excited, in Denver Colorado.

The reason we were very excited, not that Denver isn't nice in itself, is that the next day we had tickets to our first ever Collage Football game. The plan was to drive to Boulder, the town supporting the CU campus, purchase Buffalo's shirts, explore a bit, then see the game. This didn't happen, because it turns out that American's have a different concept of "Seeing a game" than Australians. For example, I had never heard the term tail-gating before. We asked the first people we saw on the CU campus where we could by shirts, they directed us to the book store, and then told us to come back and have a beer with them. After buying the shirts, we wondered back and they showed us how sport should be watched, tail-gating style.

Tail-gaters will rock up to a sporting event at about 10:00, in their specially fitted out tail-gating van. In this case it was a repainted ambulance, "Because it already has electricity connected to the back, so you can keep the keg cold and power the TV to watch the game." The rules for tail-gating are simple, its like a pre-game BBQ to which every one in sight is invited. If they walk past, offer them food and a beer, because everyone is there to support the same team so they're all your friends.

The following can not do justice to the tail-gating experience, but they're the best I can manage.
Firstly, they have a real, live Buffalo mascot.
This is Ralphie V, a young female Buffalo. It takes 4 men to control Ralphie V as she runs around the field. They use young female Buffalo because they're small.
They have cheer leaders,

and flag girls,

and a marching band,

and more marching band,

and about 80 players per team.

The tail-gaters, Peter Griffin (no joke, the photographer here) and Tiffany (I'll give you three guesses) took us to the student section of the stadium. We spent the whole game standing on the bleachers yelling and singing the CU fight song.

The rest of our time in Denver was spent watching NFL and meeting local marathon runners and bar staff. We also booked a few nights Avon, in the Rockies, and in Flagstaff, near the Grand Canyon. But those stories will have to wait for another time.

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